The Family

Yes, we're crazy. We've heard it before, we'll hear it again.
 
We're both animal lovers. When Amy and I first met, I had two dogs, she had a cat and three birds. Now, we've spent over six years working as volunteers for various animal rescues, often serving as a foster home for very difficult cases. Over that time, we fostered over 90 animals and found them great forever homes.... and well, a handful of them proved unadoptable and therefore stayed with us permanently. Because we've committed to not having children -- though we may eventually adopt -- we treat our pets as if they are our children. So, without further ado, here is our family, in order of adoption.  
 
 

Clyde

12 year-old orange tabby - "Cletus."

Amy found Clyde when he was a starving kitten way back in 1999. She fed him cold cuts of ham, and he was suddenly hers forever. Perhaps a result of his starving kittenhood, Clyde loves to gorge himself on food and will frequently eat until he throws up his dinner, then he'll re-eat and repeat. Sometimes, when he becomes unhappy with the food rations he gets, he'll caterwaul and whine to the point of annoyance. He also attempts to go outside and try his luck begging food from neighbors. He's weird, but Amy came with him, so what can I say? He's a lover cat, and frequently snuggles while folks watch TV. He's getting older, so he's a bit grumpy at times, but all-in-all, he still acts pretty young.

 

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Rikki

11 year-old collie mix - "Looks like Lassie, Acts Like Cujo"

I adopted Rikki from ARF in Muncie, Indiana in January of 2001. At the time, she was a one year-old puppy who'd been badly abused. When I visited her at ARF while browsing for a dog, she took to me instantly. According to the ladies there, I was the first person she had paid any attention to in the four months she'd been there, so she came home with me. The only problem was, she really didn't tolerate many other people. She was okay with me, my girlfriend, my parents and brother... and that's about it. Everyone else she ever met had to bribe her with hot dogs or other treats, or risk being bitten right in the rear. Though she doesn't exactly play well with others -- she's been kicked out of two apartment complexes for biting, and has bitten one of our landlords -- she's been with me now for nearly 11 years. She's an old lady now; though she doesn't act it, she'll be 12 years old in January. She loves sleeping, eating BBQ ribs, being brushed, running around fenced yards, going for walks in quiet neighborhoods, and going to the dog park right after big snowfalls when no one is around.
 

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Roger

16 year-old blue crown conure - "Roger-Dodger."

Amy adopted Roger in 2002 from a really disgusting pet store for the sum of $25. The owners of the pet store had become irritated at Roger because she screamed and bit. And yes, Roger is a she -- she was named Roger before her biological sex was known. Anyway, Roger was kept in a tiny, rusty cage at that store, and had been in seven homes in her seven years to that point. When Amy adopted her, she promised Roger that her home would be Roger's last, and that promise has proven true. Though Roger screamed and bit the pet store owners, she was much nicer to Amy from the start. Roger likes tearing up Kleenexes, eating sunflower seeds (but only as a treat), talking, singing (she sounds like a mix between a kazoo and a trumpet), taking showers, playing with silly looking toys, and hanging out with Amy. Though she is definitely bonded to Amy and claims to be her bird, sometimes when Amy's not in the room she'll hang out with me and sing... at least, until Amy comes back in the room, at which time she acts like she hates me and pretends to bite me. A drama queen, AND a whore.
 

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Charley

Eight year-old boxer-terrier mix - "Best. Dog. EVER."

I adopted Charley from the Muncie Animal Shelter in April of 2003. I went to the shelter to help my parents find a cat, and Charley was a six month-old puppy who was going to be euthanized at the end of the day. In talking to Charley, I figured out that he was a special dog, and against my better judgement, he came home with me. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. Charley really is an amazing dog, a true companion. When I first adopted him, I went through some rough patches in my life and he was there for me every step of the way. He is the most empathetic dog I have ever met, and he's always looking for a way to cheer someone up if they're feeling down. Usually, if he thinks you're not feeling well, he'll bring you toys, because toys make him happy. He's very well disciplined, and has learned probably 40 or 50 different commands and tricks. He is a very well-mannered boy around other dogs, and is usually the one we use to temperament-test dogs from the pound. He absolutely loves going to BowWow Beach, chasing balls into the water, jumping in, and swimming to retrieve them. He would do this 20 hours a day if his little legs would allow it. He's also quite the socialite, and never met a friendly person he didn't like.
 

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Kelsey

Nine year-old Senegal parrot - "Crap."

Kelsey was my first attempt at bird ownership. I bought her from a pet store in Dayton, Ohio in late 2003 (I didn't know any better at the time, forgive me) when she was two years old and tried to be her person. She denied me that opportunity, and chose to hang out with Amy instead. Amy's definitely got the rapport with birds in our family. Kelsey likes shredding piñatas, turning wood bird toys into toothpicks, giving (loud) kisses, eating nuts, and saying "crap." When she talks, she sounds like a robot. Cracks me up.
 
 
 
 
 

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Lucy

Nine year-old shepherd mix - "Tripod."

We began fostering a four year-old Lucy as our first EVER foster dog in December of 2005, annnnnnnd.... she never left. She was born a stray and at 10 weeks old, she was hit by a car. The nice folks at Pet Guards Shelter in Cuyahoga Falls took her in and got her medical care, amputating her back left leg. She was eventually adopted out to an older gentleman who kept her for three years until he was left unable to care for her anymore. Upon her return to Pet Guards, Lucy had learned some very bad habits and had developed separation anxiety. This meant that any time she was left alone in a home situation, she became destructive, eating cabinetry, drywall, doors or anything she could get to. Though she was generally a good dog, between this and missing a leg, Lucy was seen by many prospective homes as unadoptable. So, because Amy worked at Pet Guards at the time, we began fostering her over Christmas of 2005 to help her be rid of these habits. Though most of her separation anxiety was gone, she never generated any interest from potential adopters. After more than a year of living in our home, we adopted her permanently. In the summer of 2009, Lucy tore the equivalent of her ACL in her back leg, so she had to endure major orthopaedic surgery to repair it. Rehab included over three months of not walking, which meant going outside meant being carried in a sling. Today, she's fully recovered and still enjoys full use of her back leg. Lucy loves going for rides in the car, eating, doing tricks (especially speaking), going for walks, going to the dog park and sleeping. She's very easily excited, and if she thinks there's any chance she'll be included when she leaves the house, she acts a bit crazy.
 

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Kody

Five year-old boxer-terrier mix - "Monster."

Kody's life began in some odd circumstances. As a small puppy, he was taken in from the pound by a rescue in Columbus, Ohio. That rescue adopted him out to a home in New Castle, Indiana in late 2006 that was apparently filled with meth-heads. Good job, rescue! Anyway, Kody lived a house where there were many dogs and cats crapping all over the place, and the people just didn't care about it. So dogs, cats, children and adults were all wandering around, tracking turds through the entire house, and not caring about it. Somehow, the rescue got tipped off about this situation and determined that it just might be a problem. An emergency e-mail went out to rescue groups, and Amy arranged that her parents (in nearby Indianapolis) might go pick up Kody and get him out of this mess. They did, and they eventually brought Kody over to us. Though Kody was intended to be a foster dog, he came with a number of bad habits for a four month-old. Beyond having absolutely no care about crapping in the house, he also was very food protective because the people in the crap-house didn't feed him enough. It took over a year for us to train these things out of him entirely, and by that time, Amy had adopted him permanently. Today, Kody is Charley's best doggie buddy. They play together constantly, stalking each other from across the yard, playing tug with toys, and competing for play time. Kody also likes going to BowWow Beach and going swimming.
 

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Zak

31 year-old blue and gold macaw - "Bawk!"

Zak spent most of his first 27 years in North Carolina. Toward the end of that time, he ended up in a "rescue" where a lady was hording parrots in her old decrepit barn. He spend several years in a small cage in that barn with up to 50 other parrots in other cages, with only one single light bulb bringing light for the entire place. He was in this barn through several hurricanes, during one of which his right wing was injured. Because the crazy lady who owned him did not get him medical care, his wing healed incorrectly and now hangs slightly lower. It also means, perhaps most sadly, that he can never fly again. In late 2008, he was rescued by people associated with Parrot Hope Rescue, who we volunteered for in Ohio. He moved in with us as a foster bird. Amy fell in love with him through his rehabilitation, and adopted him. He's very definitely bonded with Amy (though he'll talk to me if I have a cheeseburger or a walnut in my hand), and he doesn't have much time for anyone else. He's one of the quietest macaws we've ever heard of, only squawking a "bawk" very rarely. Zak enjoys getting baths, hanging out with Amy, eating walnuts and trying to scare me (it doesn't work).
 

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Daisy

Eight year-old red bullmastiff - "D-Train! Next Stop: Jowlville."

Oh, what a mess. Daisy had a hard life before we got her as well. Notice a common theme amongst these pets? Daisy was used as a backyard breeder somewhere in around Ravenna for the first six years or so of her life. From what we can tell, she spent her entire life in a wire cage, with little human interaction beyond feeding, watering and breeding. She gave birth to many litters, and probably provided her owners with all kinds of money. Then, when she apparently wasn't as productive anymore, she was turned out on the street. The Portage County Dog Warden found her as a stray, having recently given birth, nearly starved, and with a number of health issues. She weighed 78 pounds, nearly 35 pounds underweight for her frame. Her teeth had been ground down by her owners to nubs. We took her in as a foster dog to help with her rehabilitation. Though we helped work on many of her issues, none of the families that visited her ever wanted to adopt her because she was an imperfect dog. Some of the folks that visited her couldn't get over her saggy stomach, the size of her nipples (yes, seriously!), her ugly teeth, or her rough-skinned knees. After about six months and five home visit rejections, we decided that Daisy should live with us because she had already gone through enough. Daisy loves eating, and will eat anything at any time. She also loves sunning herself on sunny days and will lay in the yard for hours in the sun, making us wonder if she ever saw the sun before she escaped her torturous life before. She is absolutely petrified of thunderstorms, and will try to hide from the noise by clawing under the couch (which doesn't work) or out the fence gate (which usually does, resulting in a chase around the neighborhood). Daisy is a very sweet girl, but she just isn't very smart. In nearly three years with her, she hasn't yet learned to shake paws. We joke that the hamster that runs on the wheel in her head is 80 years old and only has one leg.
 

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Toby

Nine year-old catalina macaw - "Hello! Toby Bird!"

Toby came to us as a Parrot Hope foster bird. His other homes had encountered trouble with him because of his noise and because he was aggressive. After some work with Amy, the aggression issues were worked out, and through the course of that rehab, Amy fell in love. Now Toby lives a pretty charmed life. Like all of the birds, he mostly hangs out with Amy. He likes to destroy wood toys by turning them into toothpicks, eating walnuts, talking (but only when he feels like it) and screaming at the sunset. His body feathers are a beautiful orange pattern, and I think he's one of the prettiest birds I've ever seen.
 
 

 

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Ellie

Nine year-old goffins cockatoo - "Poor Ellie."

Amy originally met Ellie a very long time ago, in early 2003. At the time, Ellie was being sold by a crazy bird breeder in St. Louis as an "imperfect baby bird," meaning that she was going to spend her life used as a breeding bird. What was wrong with Ellie, you ask? Her mother had bitten off a couple of her toes in the nest... Enough to (apparently) be worthless as a pet or anything else but an egg factory. Anyway, Amy brought home Ellie, who was still being handfed at the time (in non-parrot speak, that means she was REALLY young, almost recklessly young on the part of the breeder/seller). So, Amy teamed up with her mom to handfeed Ellie through this time. Only problem was, Ellie ended up choosing Amy's mom as her chosen person, and not Amy. The next year when Amy and I were married, Ellie stayed with Amy's parents because she was so attached to them. This worked great, until 2009 when their life situation changed and they had to give Ellie up. So, at that point, Ellie came to live with us. Oddly, she is the only bird in the entire flock who's chosen to prefer me as a person to talk to. Amy blames it on an incident several years before where he told Ellie "no" and scolded her for doing something bad. I just think the bird is a bit confused about who the chief bird person is in the household....
 

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Ted

Eight year-old grey tiger - "Thederick."

Ted came to us as a present to Clyde. We had a cat named Oliver who died unexpectedly in early 2010. After that, Clyde fell into a major depression, losing a significant amount of weight and really just not moving for a couple of months. To help calm his loneliness, we began looking for another cat to be his companion. One fateful day on July 2010, we went to Rescue Village in Geauga County and visited the room set aside for older cats. When I sat down, a grey tiger cat immediately jumped in my lap, put his paws on my chest and began nosing my face. That cat was (ironically) named Tiny (I say ironically because he was not nor has be ever been tiny) and he adopted me right then and there. Ted, as he's called now, loves to eat, snuggle, play, boss dogs around, and vocally complain. He definitely prefers me but will deal with Amy when he has to.
 

 

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Gary

Eight year-old white tiger - "The Ghost Cat. Are we sure he even exists?"

Gary came home the same day that Ted did, intended to be a present to Clyde. While Ted instantly took to me at Rescue Village, Amy had slightly different ideas and fell in love with a much shyer cat, a white calico. Because of his shyness, Gary had been at Rescue Village for nearly a year without getting adopted. Since moving in with us, Gary's mostly been a "ghost cat." I've actually only interacted with him once, though that interaction was very nice and he snuggled for a while. From what I'm told, he does sometimes talk to Amy. He's an odd duck, and I'm honestly not sure if he likes doing anything besides sleeping.
 
 
 

 

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Peggy

Three year-old pug - "Defective Dog"

Peggy's a strange little dog. She was turned into the Portage County Dog Warden in September 2010 as a stray, and she had obviously given birth to puppies. The minute that word spread that a stray purebred unfixed pug was in the shelter, various breeders lined up to "adopt" her for their nefarious purposes. Because we had a connection in the pound, we pulled her before she was put on the open adoption market. She started as a foster, and her Petfinder profile quickly gathered applications from all kinds of crazy people. While that was happening, Amy fell in love, and so here she is. We call Peggy the "Defective Dog" because she's really a mess. Pugs are a poorly designed breed, prone to snoring, snorting, reverse sneezing, indigestion, stubbornness... just a real pile of leftover parts. She likes eating, eating, eating, snuggling, eating, and sleeping.